I am imperfect. I love life. I love God, my family, my job, and people.
I am a learner of new things and I contemplate most things.
I am an empath and a peacekeeper. I seek to understand.
Sometimes I get mad and yell. Most times I get mad and calm down before I address the situation.
I am a competitor and I don’t like to lose, but I believe that there is learning that can be done in defeat.
I mess up a lot so I have gotten really good at apologizing (most of the time).
I am forgiving, but sometimes I am too quick to speak the words of forgiveness and I sweep feelings under the rug only to have them resurface at a later date.
I am laid back by nature, but if I do find myself stressed I recognize all the unhealthy ways that I seek control.
I love food.
I hate clutter (unless it’s mine…then I don’t really notice it!)
When people are mean I either get defensive, dismissive, or I make up a story that explains why they are mean.
I am an overall positive person, but I am getting comfortable with uncomfortable feelings and conversations so that my positivity is not blind and toxic.
The relationships I choose to invest in make me better. To understand me you have to know about them.
My relationships are strong and deep and they make me who I am.
I am a christian. my journey with the Lord has been lifelong. I grew up in church and I got really good at going to church. However, as an adult I found the Lord. The path to Him was lined with mistakes and a whole lot of trying to do things on my own. I am a work in progress and He is teaching me daily.
I am a wife. My husband, Chris, is a high school football coach. He is my best friend. We are not perfect individuals and we most certainly do not have a perfect marriage. He makes me laugh, he makes me cry, but most importantly he makes me feel like I am home when I am with him.
I am a mother who has been blessed with two children Collins who is11 and Calloway who is 6. Collins is a miniature me in so many ways. It has been, and will be, both a delightful and painful experience to watch her grow and learn in this world. I wish so badly that she could see herself through my eyes. She is the reason that I offer myself more grace.
Calloway looks just like his daddy, but oh how we share the second child characteristics. He loves to make people laugh. He loves to connect with his people. He is shy, he is charismatic, and he is all boy.
I grew up in Joplin Missouri where my mom and dad still live. They are retired educators and still to this day are some of my favorite people in the world. You will get to know them through me because you will hear their voices and wisdom in my words. If you were to describe them each in one word my mom would be joy and my dad would be wise. The word to describe them as a couple would be selfless. My sister lives in Indianapolis. She is also in education and her story is one that brings great glory to the One who made us. You will also get to know her through my writing because the relationship that she and I have is so unique. She and I, at our core, are the same but we are also some of the most opposite people you will meet.
God knew from the beginning that I would need a circle of friends stronger than most. Throughout my 36 years he has placed in my path, an irreplaceable group of women. They have all, at different times, pushed me, held me, corrected me, sat with me, held space for me, encouraged me, loved me and given me a sense of belonging in the world even on my darkest days.
By day I get to be an elementary school counselor. I say by day, but really it bleeds into the night. I often times have people tell me they could not do what I do. They could not work with kids all day long or they could not deal with the sadness that comes with some of the stories I hear. However, what they do not understand is that I cannot believe I get to do my job. To get to go to work each day and spend time with the next generation is a gift. Each day I am teaching them, but if they only knew how they were teaching me.
Take your time to get to know me if you like. If this relationship is meant to be time and circumstance will tell.
I find that I can’t always trust my first instincts about people, more often than not, regardless of first instincts, I find something I love and/or admire about each person.
Sometimes it takes the messiness of life to really get to know someone. When their true self is exposed through difficult circumstances and pathways to genuine relationships open.
My prayer is that through my words you are able to get to know my heart and maybe even take a few things with you on your own complex journey.