Love, Courtney

Comparison for the sake of worthiness will ultimately end somewhere along the spectrum between two places:

1. A dark place of not enoughness.

• A place where you are constantly looking to others for validation. In this place, you will find yourself changing to fit into an everchanging definition of what is “cool”, or
• you may find yourself in complete rebellion to what is “cool” to fit in with the people that don’t care about “cool”. Any place where you have to change yourself to fit in is not your place of belonging.

OR

2. A sad lonely place of empty worth and unattainable enoughness.

• This is the place you get whatever it is that you were hoping to obtain, but you realize it is still an empty place. A place that requires you to continue to uphold a standard that doesn’t fill you with worthiness or joy.
• You may find yourself constantly chasing and again, never finding your place of belonging.
• You may also find yourself in an extremely self conscious and unhappy place wondering what everyone else is thinking about you.

Comparison is inevitable. In fact, our brains are wired to compare one thing to another. It is human nature and it is one way that we make sense of the world around us.

It is when we start using comparison to measure our worth that it becomes a dangerous and lonely game.

Get to know yourself. Learn to love yourself. Show yourself grace. Approach life with a growth mindset that allows you to be your best self. But don’t ever let someone else define “your best self” for you.

You will not find your worth through comparison or using someone else’s definition of good, cool, or any other word.

If you find yourself comparing or hustling for your worth (you will):

1. Just notice.
2. Gently tell yourself that it will not end with you feeling good.
3. Send love and light to yourself and whoever you were comparing yourself to.
4. Celebrate yourself with a compliment and send one out into the world for the other person as well.

Ultimately, we are training, or retraining, your brain to see and accept the good in you and the good in others without judgement of who is more worthy.

We are all already enough.